What is your grieving style?

By Irina Jordan

This post shares the highlights of the talk given by Litsa and Eleanor, co-authors of the popular blog “What’s Your Grief".

  • Recognize that you are unique and your understanding of grief and coping mechanisms are different.
  • Everyone has rational, emotional and creative sides that call for different grief tools. There is no cookie cutter approach.
  • Grief can change you: suppress your creativity or make you irrational. Recognize it.
  • Recognize your leanings: rank creative, emotional and rational for you in order of dominance.
  • It helps to be sympathetic when remembering everyone copes with grief differently.
  • You will cycle through many different emotions that change constantly when grieving. It can be overwhelming.
  • Learn to give yourself and others a break. Let different emotions flow, don't suppress them.
  • Read other people's reflections and memoirs to understand your emotions better and share your experience.
  • You can express your feelings through drawings, photography and crafts.
  • Creative tools can be really helpful for adults and kids: art and play therapy.
  • If our grief doesn't conform to 5 stages of grief, it can be confusing, especially to rational types.
  • Get a good overview of different grief theories to identify with one.
  • Different types of losses can impact your grief experience. Search specific tools for your type of loss.
  • Have a plan in advance for holidays and anniversaries when grieving (using your rational self).
  • Slow down, be present, look at your life and be grateful for what you have.
  • Find one thing you're grateful for each day and reflect on it. Write in a gratitude journal before going to bed.
  • There is no normal. Embrace what works for you. Don't expect to follow a certain timeline.
  • Find your way to express your grief and connect with others.